Watching of the Weight

I've got news for you. I'm fat. I'm talking, buying two seats in the airplane/my wedding bands look like silver pigs in a blanket/try and pass me without giggling, fat.

I have no one to blame but my husband. He just loves me too much for who I am. I wish he would just start making disparaging remarks towards me. Start ending every hug hug by pinching the extras around my midsection. But the man is just so accepting. Straight pisses me off.

As you know (since you are a daily reader of my blog and all), I am running which is great. I am building endurance and all that crap, but the weight is just not coming off. So I joined Weight Watchers. I have seen people that I know be extremely successful with this method. When I say successful I mean loosing 100+ pounds. So when my doctor mentioned that he thought Weight Watchers was I good idea I decided to go for it. Right after I took my eye daggers out of his groin.

My company does a great thing in providing us with a meeting at work during work hours so there is really no excuse for me not to go. I mean, who doesn't want to sit around with all of the tubby tubbies from their office talking about what may or may not have been the catalyst for last Tuesday's sausage binge?

I walk through the cubes yelling "Fatty fat is going to fat class! Who's joining me???" Yeah, my meeting mates don't like me very much.

To be honest I get pissed at these meetings. There are people in there who loose weight like gang busters and openly admit that they are not working out. Yet here I am running 12-20 miles a week and not loosing anything. SAY WHAT?

So, you're telling me that 'Christi Cubeland' looses 5 pounds because she cut out soda and starting walking to the bathroom instead of using her catheter, but because I ate an extra piece of rye bread while running on the treadmill with a fully armored Marine on my back, I don't loose anything? I almost turned over the table. Wendy the weigh-in lady almost lost her life.

Joking aside I have lost some weight. Good thing because it was going to be a real show if my effort had not shown up on the scale.

Why, do you ask, am I bearing all? I hope it will inspire, but also embarrass myself enough to continue to lose. Oh but mostly to make you feel better about yourself.

You good now? :)


  1. Holy crap - I'm convinced I will lose weight just from reading your blog because of how hard you make me laugh. Keep the calorie burning posts coming!! And by the way, you're awesome.

  2. You ain't fat - you're beautiful! Funny, but hard for a mother to take. Besides, I just saw you and you look great! Keep up the good work. I'm bringing hummus and edamame for Saturday :)

  3. As I sit here holding a sleeping 15 week old in my arms (yes, only babysitting, no illegitimate children yet), I have to stifle laughs in reading your blog. Particularly the catheter part. Good-ness. Hysterical. Ps--you are NOT fat.